Sometimes emotion gets stuck for an hour. Sometimes it gets stuck for decades. The patterning of your stuck-ness builds an armour designed to keep you safe and promote your success. Often we call these patterns ‘personality’, but it’s not really who you are.
In safety (defence) mode it can turn up as clever, manipulative, righteous, seductive, superior, flippant, arrogant. In success mode it can turn up as creativity, insight, charm, humour, care, capability. On a bad day it can feel like anger, sadness, fear, threat, guilt, shame, uncertainty. Being stuck limits your leadership (and life).
Regulating is how the emotion becomes unstuck. We have choices about regulating. Some are healthier and more productive than others.
- Exercise is better than drinking.
- Art is better than drugging.
- Talking is better than bottling.
I don't know the truth, or perhaps I know enough to know to be careful with 'knowing' anything. However the ability to name emotions, understand why they manifest in you the way they do and process them, is helpful.